Classic Movie Quotations: Titles O-Q

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All the following audio files are in .WAV format unless otherwise noted. All files are ordered according to movie, or where unknown, under a miscellaneous category. Click the sound icon next to the title to access the file.

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OF HUMAN BONDAGE (1934):

• "You dirty swine! I never cared for you -- not once! I was always making a fool of ya. Ya bored me stiff! I hated ya! It made me sick when I had to let you kiss me! I only did it because ya begged me. Ya hounded me and drove me crazy! And after you kissed me, I always used to wipe my mouth -- wipe my mouth!" --Bette Davis.

ON GOLDEN POND (1981):

• "Don't be such an old poop!" --Katharine Hepburn.

ON THE BEACH (1959):

• "The war started when people accepted the idiotic principle that peace could be maintained by arranging to defend themselves with weapons they couldn't possibly use without committing suicide." --Fred Astaire.

ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST (1968):

• "How can you trust a man that wears both a belt and suspenders?  Man can't even trust his own pants." --Henry Fonda (a .RM file).

PATTON (1970):

• "I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country.  He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.  Men, all this stuff you've heard about America not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dump.  Americans traditionally love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle.  When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, the big league ball players, the toughest boxers.  Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser.  Americans play to win all the time.  I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed.  That's why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans.  
     Now, an army is a team.  It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team.  This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap.  The bilious bastards who wrote that stuff about individuality for The Saturday Evening Post don't know anything more about real battle than they do about fornicating.  
     Now we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit and the best men in the world.  You know, by God, I actually pity those poor bastards we're going up against.  By God, I do.  We're not just going to shoot the bastards.  We're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks.  We're going to murder those lousy Hun bastards by the bushel.  
     Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you'll chicken out under fire.  Don't worry about it.  I can assure you that you will all do your duty.  The Nazis are the enemy.  Wade into them.  Spill their blood.  Shoot them in the belly.  When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do.  
     Now there's another thing I want you to remember.  I don't want to get any messages saying that we are holding our position.  We're not holding anything.  Let the Hun do that.  We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything except the enemy.  We're going to hold onto him by the nose, and we're going to kick him in the ass.  We're going to kick the hell out of him all the time, and we're going to go through him like crap through a goose.  
     There's one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home, and you may thank God for it.  Thirty years from now when you're sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you what did you do in the great World War II, you won't have to say 'Well, I shoveled shit in Louisiana.'  
     Alright now, you sons of bitches, you know how I feel.  I will be proud to lead you wonderful guys into battle -- anytime, anywhere.  That's all." --George C. Scott (a .MP3 file).
• "For over a thousand years, Roman conquerors returning from the wars enjoyed the honor of a triumph, a tumultuous parade.  In the procession came trumpeters and musicians and strange animals from the conquered territories, together with carts laden with treasure and captured armaments.  The conqueror rode in a triumphal chariot, the dazed prisoners walking in chains before him.  Sometimes his children, robed in white, stood with him in the chariot or rode the trace horses.  A slave stood behind the conqueror holding a golden crown and whispering in his ear a warning that all glory is fleeting." --George C. Scott (a .MP3 file).

THE PHILADELPHIA STORY (1940):

• "It's astonishing what money can do for people. Don't you agree, Mr. Conner? Not too much, you know. Just more than enough. Now take Tracy, for example. Never a blow that hasn't been softened for her. Never a blow that won't be softened. As a matter of fact, it even changed her shape. She was a dumpy little thing at one time." --Cary Grant
         "Only as it happens, I'm not interested in myself for the moment." --Katharine Hepburn
        "Not interested in yourself? You're fascinated, Red! You're far and away your favorite person in the world!" --Cary Grant.
• "No, you're made out of flesh and blood. That's the blank, unholy surprise of it. Oh, you're the golden girl, Tracy -- full of life and warmth and delight. Ah, what goes on? You've got tears in your eyes." --Jimmy Stewart.
• "Nothing ever possibly in the least ever happens here." --Virginia Weidler.
• "CK Dexter Haven. Oh, CK Dexter Haven!" --Jimmy Stewart.
• "Eh, this is the voice of doom calling. Your days are numbered to the seventh son of the seventh son." --Jimmy Stewart.
• "You haven't switched from liquor to dope by any chance, have you Dexter?" --Katharine Hepburn.
• "My, she was yare." --Katharine Hepburn
         "Yare?  What's that mean?" --John Howard.
        "It means, uh... easy to handle, quick to the helm, fast, bright --  everything a boat should be... until she develops dry rot." --Katharine Hepburn.

PILLOW TALK (1959):

• "Mr. Allen, this may come as a shock to you, but there are some men who don't end every sentence with a proposition." --Doris Day.

THE PLANET OF THE APES (1968):

• "Take your stinking paws off me, you dirty ape!" --Charlton Heston.

THE QUIET MAN (1952):

• "Is this a courtin' or a donnybrook? Have the good manners not to hit the man until he's your husband and entitled to hit you back." --Barry Fitzgerald.
• "There'll be no locks or bolts between us, Mary Kate -- except those in your own mercenary little heart!" --John Wayne.

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